Home sweet home!
Up until recently I always consider that traveling and adventure is the coolest thing. Since I was in school, I would write traveling as my other hobby besides reading. I truly believe that it’s very cool if we could travel to places as far as possible, take time as long as possible, meet strange people as strange as possible (:P hihihi). Besides that, it makes me sound like cool and sophisticated person. All my life, I have never leaved my island, Java. The furthest t travel I have made was when I was six years old and I had to leave my town, Bogor, in west Java, and lived for a year in east Java with my granny ( I never believed I said this but I really miss her, may God bless him with the best place she could ever imagine). I always see the stranger in my town as the luckiest people in the world and that they all must feel happy and careless.
That is why when I finally had a chance to travel I gladly welcome the chance. My first travel as an adult (I flew up up and away…… to Berlin (almost 13 hours flight or so ungefahr, cape deh…), leaving my beloved small city (Bogor is actually not really that small compare with other city in Indonesia, it just that after more than thirty years that I have passed on its street from west end, to east end, to north end, made a round to south end in it, then it felt small enough for me).
Now, after quite many occasions of trips I must made for work, I realize that next time I should really consider saying no, or at least be more selective. The only thing that stop me for doing that until now that I don’t want to sound like whiny and old fashion. I must stop pretending to be ‘berjiwa petualang’, because the truth is that I am miserable when I am away. I always had schlecte Laune when I am away. It is already begin by packing, with the much faster heartbeat than usual, not mention the grumpy (sorry mom, dad, sis, bro to have to put up with my grumpiness every time I am preparing my trip). The sweat I felt in my hand on the way to airport. The frown I gave to many people I felt they staring at me (gosh I must look and behave really like a jerk I hate). I become much more sensitive and grumpy than I usually.
The longer I stay, more miserable and lonely I would feel. Streets might look much nicer than those at my home, but it felt empty because I don’t know anybody who lived there, or remembered ever walk upon in with anyone. Weather might much friendlier than the rainy weather in my town, but I would stare from the window and wondering what time it is now back at home.
That only different when I go with people who really close to me, people who I feel comfortable with.
When I think about it, I feel like at those time, I feel like turtle who carrying its home on its back. I don’t feel lost or alienated. Suddenly is the place look much more inviting, offering new interesting sight to see. I would walk tirelessly, checking on every corner and taking as much as mental picture as I could. I’ll still be happy with any delay flight, ensuring people around me that everything is God plan for our best.
So I finally got to conclusion that it is the best for me to admit that I don’t really like to travel all by my self, I love my very small house in a quite small town. I don’t care if my college would consider me as old fashion, or even coward (but I must make it clear that I don’t afraid to travel, it just that I don’t really enjoy it). I prefer to work here at home than anywhere in the world. Unless of course if it a travel I have to make is a travel with the company of people from my comfort zone. Who’s of course would delete most of my co- worker.
(Bali, July 09 )